Friendship is something we all desire and having great friends definitely improves our lives! Oftentimes its the people in our lives that make us better.
So why is it that we are so tormented by certain friendships. Some fizzle. Some go sour. And some grow apart.
Nonetheless, there are signs, BIG SIGNS, that we often overlook. So today I want to share with you 7 signs that a friendship may have run it’s course.
After you listen to this episode, you might realize that there is someone in your life that you need to distance yourself from. What do you do then?
Well, you have a couple options.
- You can sit down and tell them directly that you don’t want to continue being friends. However, this is a tough approach and can sometimes cause more damage than good. In my experience, one of the few times this approach is necessary, is when the other person has truly hit rock bottom and they need to understand the risk of losing you as a friend.
- Slowly allow things to drift apart. Just let the friendship progress into nonexistence.
So now that you know WHAT you’re going to do, here are the 7 signs.
1. You no longer agree with the quality of their character, and lack of integrity.
2. You always do all the work. If your friendship is one sided, then it might be time to re-evaluate your friendship. HOWEVER, I want to follow this statement up with the important point that, good friendships sometimes shift to support one person over the other, depending on the season. So be honest with yourself, and ask “am I always doing all of the work, or am I doing all of the work just right now.”
3. You can’t truly be yourself. If you feel like you need to be someone else when you’re around this person, then there is the fear that they don’t accept you for truly who you are.
4. If you feel entirely responsible for their happiness. You are not responsible for someone else’s happiness. You can be a part of their happiness, but you aren’t responsible for it.
5. You have very little that feels good about the relationship. If the friendship isn’t adding to your life, then it’s time to dedicate your time to those who DO lift you up.
6. Trust issues. If you don’t have trust, you don’t have a friendship.
7. The other person has the maturity of a middle schooler.
There is no room for immaturity in friendships. If someone plays games, gossips, or is unable to be a grown A** adult when it comes to your friendship…. then it’s time to move on.
I hope that by sharing these 7 signs, I have shed some light on a particular relationship you have. But before you move forward and take action in a particular friendship that has gone south, ask yourself what TRULY is the best approach. Is a sit down conversation really necessary. Or are you able to create personal boundaries with this person and just allow your relationship to organically shift?
Karen says
This article is so timely it is uncanny. Just today I reached my limit with a long time friend and have shut the door on our so called friendship. Several of the reasons you list ring very true and now I know I made the right decision. Thank you!
Chalene Johnson says
You’re welcome!